On a daily basis, we hear about the heartbreaking prevalence of female sexual harassment and abuse. Yet, male sexual abuse is often underreported and seldom discussed, despite the fact that it is, unfortunately, just as common. Studies show that approximately 1 in 6 boys will experience some form of sexual abuse by the age of 18, and some research suggests that the ratio could be as high as 1 in 4.
Why Is This Issue So Underreported?
The reason male sexual abuse is underreported is multifaceted. Many men feel embarrassed or ashamed to admit that they have been the victims of sexual abuse, particularly if it was perpetrated by another man. Our society has ingrained gender roles that dictate that men should be invulnerable, emotionally strong, and able to handle pain without showing it. This cultural expectation can make it difficult for men to acknowledge their trauma, let alone speak out about it.
For many male survivors of sexual abuse, the experience is repressed, as they may feel the need to hide their emotions and deny what has happened. This denial can lead to isolation, anger, sadness, shame, guilt, and fear. It is not uncommon for male survivors to develop mental health issues such as Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), major depression, anxiety, and substance abuse as a result of their trauma.
The Importance of Seeking Help
If you are a survivor of sexual abuse, it is crucial to know that you are not alone. While society may still struggle with fully acknowledging the prevalence of male sexual abuse, the conversation is gradually becoming more open, which helps reduce the stigma and shame surrounding it. Education and understanding are vital to help male survivors heal, as well as to challenge the misconceptions that surround male victimisation.
Despite the societal challenges, it is essential that male survivors seek support. Suppressing or ignoring the pain does not lead to healing. Working with a therapist can provide a safe space to process complex emotions and begin to address feelings of depression, anxiety, and trauma. In particular, Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) is an approach that can help survivors of abuse navigate the impact of their trauma on their emotional well-being and relationships. EFT helps individuals explore their emotions, identify patterns, and move towards healing in a supportive, understanding environment.
Healing is possible, and by seeking the right help, it can be a journey towards reclaiming your sense of self, strength, and emotional well-being.
If you or someone you know is a male survivor of sexual abuse and would like support, please get in touch. I am more than happy to discuss how I may be able to help.
If you would like support, please do not hesitate to contact me through email. I am seeing clients online globally and in person at my office in Hove.