Is there a threat to your relationship?
Remember when Ashley Madison, the American based website that helps people cheat on their partners was hacked? As news spread, many were left wondering if partners were capable of cheating and their relationship was threatened.
A survey by a polling company has uncovered some rather startling statistics. Overall, one in five British adults admits to having had an affair, while a third say they have thought about it.
The survey also reveals that, of those who say they have had an affair, only half have stopped at one. A quarter has had two affairs, while 20% have had three or more. 8% have had five or more affairs.
A research paper from the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships discovered that the average person has about 42% likelihood of cheating on their significant other. 9% of those researched admitted they had already strayed. If these numbers are getting you wondering about your relationship, here are four signs your partner is being, or thinking about being unfaithful.
Before becoming too concerned, while these are potential signs, please do not interpret this as an exact science. These behaviour changes are simply tendencies that can happen if someone is emotionally moving away from a relationship and finding connection somewhere else.
1. Increased time away from the home
Has your partner suddenly become socially very active? More time spent at social events without you or with co-workers after the workday is finished? Is their job suddenly requiring they devote more time to out of town travel assignments?
2. Phone usage becoming secretive
Is your partner spending more time texting on their mobile phone? When you enter the room, do they suddenly put it down? Are they defensive or abrasive when you ask about their phone activity?
3. Your significant other seems more irritable
Do they seem like they are getting irritated by anything you say or do? Do they blow up when asked simple questions or accuse you of accusing them of something?
4. Lack of sexual desire
Even though you notice that they are paying more attention to their general appearance, they have a lack of sexual desire towards you.
You can recover from an affair
While it is painful to recognise your relationship might not be as strong as it once was, the good news is you can recover from an affair.
When the person who stepped outside the relationship shows genuine remorse by understanding and feeling the pain the partner who has been at the receiving end of the affair has gone through, forgiveness and healing can begin. The relationship can become even more durable than it once was. This healing process takes time and commitment.
If you or someone you know is reeling from the betrayal of infidelity and you’d like to explore how to move forward, please get in touch with me. I’d be more than happy to discuss how I might be able to help. I offer couples counselling from my office in Hove and Online
