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How Infidelity Affects Mental Health


No one ever wants to be on the receiving end of romantic betrayal.

The emotional pain of discovering that someone you love and trust has been cheating and lying to you can be overwhelming.

When you experience massive deception and betrayal, it can leave you feeling sadness, confusion, resentment and anger. Many feel an increase in anxiety, and a decreased in self-esteem. But infidelity does not just affect our emotional health; it also affects our mental health.

Many who experience infidelity go through the same symptoms that are linked to Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), becoming disorientated and confused as to what has happened.

Some of the classic symptoms of PTSD often experienced by those whose partners have cheated on them are:

  • Looping intrusive thoughts
  • Inability to regulate emotions
  • Out of body experiences
  • Oscillating between feeling numb and rageful
  • Hyper alert (looking for potential threats)
  • Feeling helpless and vulnerable
  • Confusion and disorientation
  • Problems with memory and cognition
  • Lack of trust

If you have bee the victim of infidelity, then you know that you, like a soldier returning from war, have been psychologically injured and you require tender care to set you on the path back to you.

Healing from Infidelity

As devastating as it can be to learn that your significant other has betrayed you in such an intimate way, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. You can pick up the pieces of your life and find joy and comfort once again.

Here are some ways you can begin to heal after infidelity:

Be Gentle On Yourself

Do not fall into the “I should have known” trap. This is not your fault. Now is the time to be on your own side.

Breathe Deeply

Your emotions will be overwhelming for a little while. You will feel lost, anxious and panicky. When those feelings start to rise, stop, take a deep, slow breath and let it out. Take another one and another one. It is incredible how deep breathing can completely calm us almost instantly. Your breath will become your new best friend.

Seek Counselling

Remember, you are not just healing from infidelity, you are recovering from the PTSD symptoms that infidelity caused. You will need support to help you cope with these symptoms that you are currently experiencing.

If you would like to explore getting support for you and your relationship with couples counselling, please get in touch with me. I would be happy to help you and your partner get back on track and help you to feel whole and happy once again.

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